Stupid Short Stories
by Molly
Summary: They are just as the title discribes them...why do I need a summary


**Short Stupid Stories **

_A/N - These were written by myself and my sisters during random fits of insanity during last summer, or as some people call it, we were really bored. The views here are not ones expressed by us, and they are not meant to insult in any way shape or form. Just have fun_

1- The execution   
Once there was a man with a gun. He shot a police officer. He was executed and died 

2- The pickle   
Once a Quick trip manager had a poisoned pickle. He sold it to a man. the man got real sick and died 

3-The car  
Once there was a car. It got into a wreck and smashed up. It was made into scrape metal 

4- Ouch  
Once there was a dude. He got hit on the head. "Ouch" he said. 

5- The dog  
Once there was a dog,. He found a bone. He was real happy. 

6- Bacon and sausage  
Once there was a pig. He was made into sausage and bacon. He wasn't a very happy 

7-Poison  
Once a dog ate a rat. The rat had just eaten some poison. Stupid dog. 

8-Hamster  
Once there was a hamster. He fell off his wheel. It is still turning. 

9- The Skunk  
Once there was a skunk, He ran into a dog. Now the dog smells 

10-Amputation  
Once a woman found a gun. She shot herself. They had to amputate her arm. 

11- Conversion  
Once there was a Jew. He converted to the Catholic church. Then he became a Baptist. 

12-Fire  
Once there was a boy who ate fire. He died 

13-Butcher knife  
Once there were two kids. One shaved his head with a butcher knife. He bled to death 

14- The gun  
A lady saw a man with a gun. She screamed. He shot her 

15- Physco  
Once a man went to the doctor. The doctor shot the man. The doctor was physco 

16-Aliens  
"Look" said Peter "Aliens!" "Help!" said Sally. The Aliens blew up the Earth 

17- Ok City bombing  
A man blew up a big building. People dies. The man died 

18- The Pool  
"Woof" said the dog. The dog fell in the pool. The dog drowned 

19- Boxing  
Two people were boxing. One hit the other in the nose. The cartilenge went into his brain. 

20- Drunk driver  
Two people got hit by a 18-wheeler. They died. The driver was drunk 

21-Wanting to  
The man drunk poison. He did because he wanted to. He died. 

22- Wolves  
The boy was riding his bike. He got attacked by wolves. He died. 

23- Coke Bottle  
There was once a Coke bottle. It sat on a shelf. It still sits there 

24- The Aliens speak  
Once there was an Alien colany. "Phymequx?" said one Alien. "Aer Ruqlt Smu." said the other. 

25- Mother  
Once there was a girl. She met a boy. They didn't get married. "What not?" asked the mother.

26-1,000,000  
The horse was in a big race. The man bet a million dollars on the horse. The horse lost.

27- Ebola Virus  
Once there was a dude . He caught the Ebola virus. He barfed up his intestines. 

28- Robin  
Once there was a robin. He saw a man. Nothing happened. 

29- Bomb  
Once a boy put a bomb in his school. It blew up. He was happy. No School 

30- Train  
Once there was a girl playing on the train tracks. The train crashes. The FBI came to take her away. 

31- Dots  
Once there was a blue dot. He met a red dot. They made a purple dot. 

32- The Baby  
Once two woman wanted the same baby. They cut it in half. It died. 

33- Phalk  
Once an asteroid was coming straight towards Earth. The people paniced and prayed to the god Phalk. It hit Mars instead. 

34-Shoes  
A man put on a pair of shoes. They had nails in them. "Ouch" he said. 

35-Race  
A man and a dog had a race. The dog won. 

36-Fight  
Two people got in a fight. One of them took out a sniper riffle and shot the other. 

37-Robbery  
A house was being robed. The police found the robber. The robber went to prison. 

38-Put to sleep  
The man bought a dog. The dog bit the boy. The dog was put to sleep. 

39-The dog  
the dog saw a cat. He chased it. He didn't catch it. 

40- Cat  
A cat saw a mouse. He chased it. He didn't catch it. 

41- Mouse  
A mouse saw some cheese. He ate it. "Yum" said the mouse. 

42- Trap  
A trap caught the mouse. " Snap" went the trap. Dead mouse. 

43- 107  
Two people were water-skiing. One was 107. He fell off his skies and drowned. 

44- Ding Dong  
"Ding dong" went the bell. "It is midnight"said Bob. "No idiot, it's 2:00" 

45- Invisible man  
Once there was a man. He was invisible. He was the invisible man. 

46- Fish  
Once there was a fish. He ate a worm. He is now on the table of the man. 

47- Bob's  
Once there was a rat names Bob and a hamster named bob. The rat killed the hamster. There cannot be two Bob's. 

48- The tree  
The car hit the tree. The tree fell down. "Ouch" said the man. 

49- Evil Dictator  
Once there was an Evil Dictator. He got shot down. "Yippy" cried the people. 

50- Writers block  
At the table sat a writer. He had writers block. He went broke and died.

51- Money  
Once a woman found a million dollars. It was monopoly money. "Oh darn" she said. 

52- Farmer in the dell  
The dog ate the cat. The cat ate the rat. The rat ate the cheese. The cheese stands alone. 

53- Snow storm  
Once there was a really big snow storm. The people ate each other. It was really disgusting. 

54- Dying  
Once a man fell from the Sears tower. He didn't die. Then he hit the ground. 

55- Vampire  
Once a boy met a chicken vampire. It tried to suck his blood. The next night his family had chicken soup for supper. 

56- Owl  
Two people had a baby owl. It grew up to be a lawyer. 

57- Break-in  
The police heard an alarm go off. They said, "Oh , it's only a break-in." "WAIT, A BREAK-IN" 

58- Teeth  
A man brushed his teeth with old toothpaste. His teeth rotted out. 

59- Jimbo  
"Hi, my name is Jimbo. I am dead. Wait, if I am dead..." Jimbo walked off. 

60- Dumb  
A man couldn't tie his shoelaces. He went to the doctor. The doctor said as advice, "You're dumb" 

61- The book  
Two people wrote the same book. They sued for plagiarism. The one with the owl layer won. 

62- Pepper spray  
Bob tried to mug Jim. Jim pepper sprayed Bob. Bob ran away. 

63- Pain  
Bob tried to mug Jim. Jim beat up Bob. Bob screamed, "Oh the pain" 

64- physco2  
Bob went to the hospital. He got shot by the physco doctor. 

65- Malpractice  
Bobs parents sued the Physco doctor for malpractice. They had the owl doctor and won. 

66- The fan  
The man had a fan. He jumped into it. He is now in may pieces. 

67- Sharks  
The people were in the boat. The boat sank. They were eaten by sharks. 

68- Taco's  
They went to taco restaurant. They had taco's. Then they went home. 

69- Mobster  
The man had a son. He grew up to be a big time mobster. The man was proud of his son. 

70- Hit-man  
The man hired a hit-man. The hit-man shot the man. "Wrong person" cried the man. 

71- Ants  
The ant carried the cucumber to the hole. It didn't fit, so they had tuna instead. 

72- The cat  
The man had a girlfriend. The girlfriend had a cat. The cat hated the man so they broke up. 

73- The circle  
The woman had a boyfriend. The boyfriend had a boyfriend. That boyfriend had a girlfriend. That girlfriend had a girlfriend that was the original woman. 

74- Brush  
The woman had a spiked brush. She tried to brush her hair. It tore off her scalp, OUCH. 

75- Desert  
The man crashed in the desert. He found water hole that was only a mirage. He died of depression. 

76- Dolls  
The girl had a doll. The doll was alive. They had teaparties, and went to parks together. 

77-Frog  
The frog drank poison. He croaked. 

78- Tornado  
The man got caught in a tornado. He went round and round and round and round... 

79- Sally  
Sally saw a candle. She picked it up and put it in her hair. No more Sally. 

80- Bob & the buffalo  
Bob saw a buffalo herd. The buffalo herd trampled Bob. Poor Bob. 

81- Peter  
Peter was so fat. So fat that there are not two Peters. 

82- Laura  
Laura had a cat. The cats name was cat. Laura was creative. 

83- The cliff  
"Bill fell off a cliff" Jane said. "Did he die?" asked John. "He did when he hit the bottom." 

84- Joe  
Joe stuck his finger in an electric socket. "Aw" said Joe. 

85- Isabelle  
Isabelle was a barber. She trimmed hair. How exciting. 

86- The daily life of a cow  
The cow was eating grass. The farmer was milking the cow. The cow was turned into hamburger meat. 


End file.
